Fear of Commitment Phobia – Gamophobia

                           

                         
 
                                                  Gamophobia is the fear of commitment, though it can also be the excessive, persistent, uncontrollable and irrational fear of marriage. It is derived from the Greek word Gamoswhich means marriage and phobos meaning fear. However, many experts agree that there is a subtle difference between the fear of marriage and the fear of commitment phobia. A person might be afraid of getting married but s/he might still remain committed to a single partner for life.

Gamophobia is not just having “cold feet” at the thought of marriage; it is the morbid fear at the idea of committing for life. Such a fear is described as being ‘parallel to the fear of dying’. People who suffer from this phobia prefer being bachelors/spinsters for life, or staying in a committed relationship without ever tying the knot.

Causes of fear of commitment phobia

As with any other specific phobia, Gamophobia is also caused by an intense negative experience in the past. It traumatizes the suffering individual to an extent to which s/he ‘learns’ to dread commitments. One creates negative images or movie stills in mind about marriage.

Often, factors like heredity, genetics, adrenal insufficiency, having a tendency towards anxiety attacks or being ‘high strung’ can also cause a fear of commitment phobia.

Symptoms of Gamophobia

A person with the fear of commitment phobia displays many psychological and emotional symptoms at the thought or subject of marriage/commitment:

Psychological symptoms include:

• Feeling of dread or terror at the thought of marriage.
• The person goes to great lengths to avoid the topic. S/he may experience uncontrollable anxiety that makes it difficult for the person to function normally.
• The individual understands that such fear is irrational but is powerless to control it.
• Really bad thoughts, movie stills or negative images are likely.
• Feeling of losing control or going crazy are also experienced by Gamophobes.

Physical symptoms of the fear of commitment are:

• Trembling
• Nausea
• Crying
• Rapid heart rate
• chest pain, dizziness, fainting
• Sweating, shortness of breath

Overcoming Gamophobia or the fear of commitment

As is the case with other specific phobias, Gamophobia can also be cured using a variety of effective techniques. The right treatment along with help and support of family and friends can go a long way in helping the individual overcome the fear of commitment.

• Talk therapy is the first line of treatment recommended for this phobia. The sufferer is encouraged to talk about his fears, the intricacies of commitments and other aspects of marriage to a trusted person. This can be a mentor, a parent, a friend or a professional mental health expert. In fact; depending on the degree and extent of the phobia, it is best to seek help from an expert psychiatrist.
• Hypnotherapy is another highly effective therapy that can help trace the roots of the Gamophobia to help unlearn negative responses formed about marriage or commitment.
• Behavior therapy and systematic exposure therapy are two other effective methods for overcoming this phobia.

People who are in a committed relationship but are suffering from the fear of marriage phobia must find ways to treat it and also confide in their partners about it. Phobias can go out of control if left untreated. Needless to say, this can cause a great deal of heartache and misery to all those involved. However, there is hope and “happily ever after” is possible in majority of such cases.

WOMEN’S STATUS AND MARRIAGE PATTERNS IN INDIA

Women in India marry and begin childbearing at young ages.  About 5 percent of
girls between the ages of 10 and 14, slightly over 35 percent of adolescent women
between the ages of 15 and 19 and about 82 percent of young women between the ages of
20 and 24 are married in India (Census of India, 1991).  And because the majority of
Indian births occur within marriage, unraveling issues surrounding women’s status and
marriage patterns is critical for gaining a deeper understanding of the basic family
demography of India and the decision-making power of women within marriages.
Data from the 1998-1999 National Family Health Survey (NFHS2) of India are
used in this paper to examine marriage patterns and their correlates for a sample of
64,855 once-married women between the ages of 25 and 49.  We first describe the basic
characteristics of marriage for the sample and then relate several measures of women’s
status to different dimensions of marriage: age at marriage, child marriage, late marriage,
age difference between spouses, and education difference between spouses.  The net
effects of women’s age, language, caste, standard of living, childhood residence, literacy
status, and stated son preference on these dimensions of marriage are examined.
Since 1978 the legal age at marriage in India is 18 for women, yet 66 percent of
the women in the sample were married before age 18.  The mean age at marriage for the sample is 16.1 years, but varies from a low of 15.4 years in the north and northwestern
regions of India, to a high of 18.3 years in the Himalayan hill states.  We find that 34
percent of women in the sample were married as children (age 14 and younger).
However, there is considerable regional variation in the sample with the northern region
showing 39 percent of women married at age 14 or younger, while the hill states show
only 13 percent of women married as children.  Late marriages (ages 25 and older)
represent only 4 percent nationally and range from 2 percent in the north and east to 9
percent in the hill states.

 The average educational difference between spouses is 2.6 years with noticeable
regional variation.  The hill states have an educational difference between spouses of 1.7
years.   In the north, the average educational difference between spouses is 3.4 years. For
a smaller sample of women (59,860) we find an average age difference between spouses
of 6.1 years.

 Results from the regression analysis of age at marriage show that being literate
and having a literate partner, and having grown up in an urban area have positive effects
on age at marriage.  Women’s age, Hindi speakers (compared to non-Hindi speakers),
and Hindus and Muslims (compared to other religions), members of a scheduled caste or
tribe (compared to other castes), and low and medium standards of living (compared to
high), as well as stated son preference, all have negative effects on age at marriage.
 Results from logistic regression analysis show that older women, Hindi speakers,
Hindus and Muslims, those from low or medium economic class levels, and those with
son preference are more likely than others to have married as a child (age 14 or younger).
Women who are literate, have literate partners, and those who grew up in urban areas are less likely to have married as children.  Caste or tribal membership does not have a
significant effect on child marriage.

 Next, we report results from the regression analysis of age difference between
spouses.  Older women, Hindus and Muslims, and those from low or medium standards
of living have greater age difference from spouses.  However, being literate or having a
literate husband, Hindi speakers, and being a member of a scheduled caste or tribe,
growing up in an urban area, and having a stated son preference all negatively affect age
difference between spouses.

 Results from regression analysis also show that women’s age, husband’s literacy,
Hindi speakers, Hindus and Muslims, those from a scheduled caste or tribe, and son
preference have positive effects on education difference between spouses.  Female
literacy, low or medium standard of living, and growing up in an urban area have
negative effects on education difference between spouses.

 In the final paper we will also report findings relating women’s status and
marriage patterns to their household decision making.  The net effects of measures of
women’s status, along with age at marriage, and age and education difference between
spouses, on the relative power and freedom women have to make household and other
decisions will also be examined.  

Practice of Sati still prevalent in India

The Indian society might have progresses and move forward, but the social evil of Sati continues to haunt us. The shocking incident of a seventy one year old woman performing Sati in Chattisgarh a few days back is an eye opener for all of us.

THE PRACTICE of Sati has been a part of our society for ages with its inception being traced to the time of the Gupta period. Though Sati is illegal and is highly condemned in our society, the act of Sati bring performed in the 21st century has shocked people. Lalmati Verma aged seventy one and a resident of Chechar village in the Raipur district in Chattisgarh. Her husband Shivnandan Verma, a local had died of natural causes. Lalmati had come to the funeral dressed in a new sari. When her husband’s body had been almost burnt and the villagers were about to leave, Lalmati jumped into the pyre and was reduced to ashes in moments. Lalmati’s three sons were totally unaware of their mother’s plans. Lalmati was a member of the Kurmi caste, which is registered in the list of the OBC’s.

Since partition there have been more than forty cases of Sati, which have been documented. A majority of the cases have occurred in rural areas, with main reasons being attributed to lack of education and awareness of the law. Sati has always been condemned even at the time of the Mughal rulers, Humayun, Akbar and Aurangzeb had made all attempts to abolish the practice of Sati. Several religious groups have condemned the practice with Guru Nanak, the first Guru of the Sikhs speaking out against it. Raja Ram Mohan Roy, at the time of independence had fought to abolish the practice of Sati during the time of the freedom struggle.


The government has made its effort to ban the evil practice. After a few incidents that were reported in the 1980’s. The government passed the Sati prevention act of 1987 and also the Rajasthan Sati prevention ordinance of 1987, for most of the Sati acts were performed in regions of Rajasthan. Jaipur was also the last princely state to ban Sati during the British Raj in the year 1846.


The Sati prevention act of 1987, makes it illegal to “abet, glorify or attempt to commit Sati”. Abetment of Sati, includes forcing someone to commit Sati. Abetment can be punished by death sentence or life imprisonment, while glorifying Sati is punishable with one to seven years in prison.

Our society has moved forward by leaps and bounds in the past few decades, but some old practices like Sati are still prevalent in rural India despite several attempts made by the government to ban them. The key is to spread awareness amongst rural areas and make the people realise the evils associated with this practice. Till such cases of Sati continue to be performed we cannot call ourselves a developed nation. It is a shame for our society till this heinous practice continues to go on.

Uproar Over Rajput 'Sati' Wife Emolates Herself On Husband's Funeral Pyre

A pretty, young bride of eight months, Roop Kanwar gained universal fame September 4th at Rajasthan's Deorala Village in northwest India. She became a sati - burning herself to death on her husband's funeral pyre. The reaction in India was an unresolved mixture of shock, admiration, outrage, reverence and embarrassment over the young girl's action. Local police failed to stop the sati. The Indian press called the act "a pagan sacrifice" and "a barbaric incident which blackened India's image in the world." Women's groups demonstrated against the sati all across India, prompting belated government action against Roop's relatives. Yet private opinions, even of prominent politicians, were ambivalent.


Roop's people, the martial Rajputs (who have inspired fear in every invader of India from the Muslims to the British), claim sati as their custom and religious right-the free choice of the widow. Groups of Rajput women marched last month in favor of sati and burned copies of the anti-sati ordinance. The situation remains a stand-off, the Rajputs proceeding with plans to build a temple on the site (they have collected over $230,000), despite a government ban and demanding that those arrested be freed.
Many newspaper reports say the widow was forced into the deed; in a word, murdered. According to all available first-hand reports, however, it was Roop Kanwar's personal decision to commit this form of ritual suicide. "Roop did not weep [upon seeing her husband's body], but she kept saying, 'I will not let you go alone, I am also coming,'" recalled eyewitness and neighbor, Meenakshi Khandelwal. When Roop's relatives tried to talk her out of it, she threatened them with sati shraap-a curse put upon those who would oppose a sati and thought to bring ruin to not only the person but his entire village. The last sati of Deorala-69 years ago-in fact cursed and ruined a man who sought to dissuade her.


Contrary to many press reports, her intentions were not only known before the funeral, but several village elders and holy men came to test her resolve, according to their tradition. Convinced that she had received the power to become a sati from the Goddess, the elders and her in-laws gave their blessings.


Meenakshi Khandelwal said, "I saw Roop dressed in bridal make-up walking along with her husband's body with a coconut in hand. There were about 900 people when the body was taken to the cremation ground. Later, the crowd swelled. It took about an hour for the preparation of the pyre. The girl stood like a rock chanting the Gayatri. Once the pyre was ready, she entered it and sat holding her husband's head in her lap. She ordered Pushpendra Singh, her brother-in-law, to light the pyre. As the fire engulfed her, Roop sat serenely talking to her relatives, not showing any sign of pain."


Many newspapers discounted this as incredible, saying she must have been heavily sedated or pushed in. But courageous willingness is, in fact, a common aspect of satis. A 17th century traveler, Francois Bernier, witnessed a sati where he "could not perceive the slightest indication of pain or even uneasiness in the victim." One witness to Roop's sati, Tej Singh, is quoted in Indian Today as saying, "She is from a well-educated family. Could this kind of woman have been forced? And there are hundreds of widows here whose husbands died even before there were pension schemes. Why were they not forced? She was a woman who believed her husband was a god and there could be no life for her without him."


Grief at the death of a loved one is one of the most common reasons for suicide in all societies. In America the suicide rate is very high, 1 in 2,000 for persons age 15 to 34 whose spouses die. Rejecting the concept that suicide is a sin, most westerners have accepted the idea, according to scholars, that man has a right to take his own life. In the last twenty years, nearly all countries have removed suicide from the law books; aiding a suicide remains a crime.


"Ritual suicide" is done in matters of injustice, honor and love. It is tied to belief in reincarnation and viewed as a sacrifice of the body, not a mortal sin against the soul. East or West, ritual suicide is regarded with respect and reverence. Will anyone forget the Buddhist priests who, in protest of the Vietnam war, burnt themselves to death in the Saigon town square? The Japanese samuri commits hari kari when his honor is lost.
Western reaction to sati-outside of missionary reports-has often been one of awe. The early Portugese traveler Pietro della Valle said, "If I knew [of a lady about to become a Sati], I will not fail to go and see her and honor by my presence her funeral with that compassionate affection, which such a great conjugal fidelity and love seem to deserve."


From its first instances in India, sati has been a practice of the warrior class, or kshatriyas. Later, other castes picked it up. Similar practices are found in the history of other peoples, e.g., American Indian, African, Chinese, Egyptian and Greek.
The first historical mention of sati in India is in the Mahabharata, composed around 300 B.C. There the wives of Lord Krishna-Rukumini, Gandhari, Sahya, Haimavati and Jambavati-ascended the funeral pyre upon his death. Sati is not mentioned in Hindu scriptures until the 1st century A.D. when the minor scripture Vishnusmriti commends it. This scripture claims a sati will be freed from rebirth as a women. Other commentators reject this logic. The hard life of a widow contributed to the occurrence of sati among those who did not feel they could live the required life of renunciation. Sati was formally outlawed in India in 1829 as a result of numerous reports of coercion on the part of relatives who sought to steal the widow's inheritance or avoid supporting her.





Without question, it is the duty of the police to make every effort to stop a sati from occurring. Yet it is doubtful whether such a determined person as Roop Kanwar could be thwarted. It may be impossible to dissuade fighting people such as the Rajputs from their ideals of self-sacrifice-either of their men in battle or their women in the love of their husbands. Western societies are embroiled in the ethical issues of terminal patients seeking "a conscious, dignified death." The customs of sati raise equally perplexing problems. 

SATI In Ancient India

Sati is an ancient ritual that is now outlawed throughout India and the East. Sati, or suttee as the British call it, is the act of a widow cremating herself on her husbands burning funeral pyre (see Embree 98). Sati is a Sanskrit word that has many meanings, one of them meaning goddess. Therefore, when a women would perform this rite, the word sati could mean either the ritual itself, or what the woman would become (a goddess) through performing the ritual (Hawley 30). Western thinking found this ritual appalling, which type of thinking is what led to the passing of the Sati Abolition Law in 1829. Since that time there have still been a few instances of widows performing sati, and by some Hindus today it is still revered as an honorable act (Narasimhan 71). During the time period when sati was allowed, there were many reasons why a widow chose it over a solitary life. There are also many reasons why it was outlawed, and cases of sati being performed since then.


Hindus have many rituals, and are particularly detailed in the way in which the rituals are performed. One account of how the ritual of sati is performed started with the men, usually Brahmins and male relatives, preparing the pyre. Women then washed the widow’s feet, and the Priests would explain to her what to do. She would lay down alongside her husband, with “her right hand under his neck, his right arm over hers, and his right leg over her” and the male relatives would then start the fire (Leslie 179). Throughout this, the women would continue wearing bangles, or jewelry of some sort. The wearing of such things shows that one is married, and in this case is a symbol of the women’s continuing state of marriage (Hawley 35).
There are cases in which women did not voluntarily perform sati, but this was uncommon. There are other uncommon cases in which a woman would want to perform sati, but be persuaded not to by friends and family. In another account, a Queen attempts to explain to her grieving son, why it is that she is performing sati, while trying to convince him to let her do it:
“Daughter, spouse, mother of heroes, how otherwise could such a woman as I, whose price was
valour, act?... Thus every limb has fulfilled its mission I have spent my store of good works, what more should I look to... I cannot endure… to make unavailing lamentations for a burnt husband. Going before, like the dust of your father’s feet, to announce his coming to the heavens,
I shall be high-esteemed of the hero-loving spouses of the gods. Therefore dishonour me no more . . . with opposition to my hearts desire” (Embree 99-100).


The ritual of sati stemmed from the negative attitudes towards being a widow. The idea of sati is not a monolithic one, and many books of scripture have different ideas on it. Some ancient scriptures, however, do promote sati due to the negativity of becoming a widow. One such scripture is, The Laws of Manu, which is an ancient book of Hindu scripture that dictates how individuals should act. In this book of scripture it is taught that widows cannot speak the
name of another man. If a widow remarries she is disgracing herself and her Lord (Wilkins 211). Hindu widows wore white saris, little or no jewelry and removed the red spot on their forehead that had been worn since marriage (Ganeri 7). There are customs by which every Hindu lives that are written in such books of scripture as The Laws of Manu. Some customs by which widows had to live by were, only eating one meal per day, and two days a month going completely without food (Wilkins 211). Even in the year 1987, over one hundred years since the abolition of sati, one Hindu woman stated that it was better to die than to be a widow. She said that widows are not permitted to wear nice clothes or eat good food and must stay inside for the
rest of their life (Narasimhan 28). Pativrata is a Sanskrit term for the ideal woman and
encompasses the thought that “if her [the pativrata] husband . . . is dead, she should also die” (Narasimhan 29). Although there are many negative factors to widowhood, performing sati gives you a positive way in which to deal with becoming a widow. A women who performs sati is not only honored and respected, but is thought to dwell in heaven for thirty-five million years [This number comes from the fact that she should reside in heaven for as many years as she has hairs on her head, which is thought to be 35, 000, 000 (Wilkins, 1887)] (Wilkins 223). When one performs sati, she becomes a goddess and may thereafter be worshipped as one, by having shrines or temples built in her honor (Hawley 34-36).


During the Reform Period in India, Ram Mohon Roy was a very influential man, and son of a wealthy Bengali Brahmin family. He lived from 1772-1833, during which time the British were heavily influencing Indian culture, education and society. Ram Mohon Roy was the founder of a famous society called the Brahmo Samaj (The Encyclopedia of Religion 479). Throughout Ram Mohon Roy’s lifetime he rejected many traditional Hindu beliefs. “He was the first Indian to publicly denounce [sati]” (Narasimhan 102). His ideas of widow remarriage and forbiddance of sati were highly influential in its future abolition. Many European travelers also witnessed sati and believed that it was inhumane (Embree 98). In 1829, Lord William Cavendish Bentick passed the Sati Abolition Law of 1829 prohibiting this ritual [This act was also called the Bengal Regulation XVII of 1829.]. Despite this law, there were still occurrences of sati, leading to the Sati Prohibition Act of 1987 (Narasimhan 53).

SATI

Sati – “Sati” means a virtuous woman. A woman who dies             burning herself on her husband’s funeral fire was  considered most virtuous, & was believed to directly go to heaven. Sati is the traditional Hindu practice of a widow immolating herself her husband’s funeral pyre.

             Sati was prevalent among certain sects of the              society in ancient India. There are mot many instances of remarriage of widows in Indian history & it is believed that women preferred death to the cursed life a widow.
             A large number of Sati committed just after the              war (like Johar in Rajasthan), when the women must have died to protect their honor from the invading enemies after their men perished in the battle field.

           Today Sati is illegal. The country owes the abolition of this deplorable practice to the crusading efforts of Raja Ram Mohan Roy, the 18th century social reformer. The ritual of Sati was banned by the   British Government .

What is Sati?

Definition:

Sati: The ancient Indian practice of burning a widow on her

 husband's funeral pyre, or burying her alive in his grave.

According to tradition, sati was supposed to be voluntary, and

often it was seen as the proper final act of a marriage.

However, many accounts exist of women who were forced to

 go through with the rite. They may have been drugged, or tied up 

before being placed on the pyre or into the grave.

In addition, strong societal pressure was exerted on women to

 accept sati, particularly if they had no surviving children to support

 them. A widow had no social standing in traditional society, and 

was considered a drag on resources.

During the colonial period, Britain tried to stamp out the

 practice of sati. It still occurs from time to time, however, 

particularly in rural areas of Rajastan.

The term "sati" can also apply to the widow who commits the

 act.The word "sati" comes from the feminine present participle of 

the Sanskrit word asti, meaning "she is true / pure."

  

Dowry System In India

Our society is suffering from many social evils at the moment. The dowry system is prevalent virtually in all parts of India. Dowry has been defined by a young lady as "the price paid by the parents for getting their daughters the post of a daughter-in-law". Parents pay huge sums of money so that their daughters may secure a satis­factory and permanent post. Unfortunately, the whole affair has assured the proportions of a scandal. The groom's parents try to extract the maximum from a matrimonial alliance. They insist on receiving huge amount of cash, luxury items like television sets, VCR's, refrigerators, cars, scooters and in certain cases even houses. Cases of harassment of young brides and bride burning on account of in-adequate dowry have multiplied during the recent years.

Dowry system is deeply ingrained in the social texture of our country. Giving away a daughter in marriage is called 'Kanyadan'. Traditionally, no 'daan' was considered to be valid unless accom­panied with 'dakshina'. The dowry was supposed to be the 'dakshina' to validate the 'Kanyadan' Kings used to give even parts of their kingdom in dowry, common people gave a dowry consisting of arti­cles of household utility and some cash. Since a girl enjoyed no right to the parental property, the system carried some kind of a moral justification also.

In modern societies marriage is an established custom designed to make society a most dependable and indivisible unit. In the present generations, however, it has come under increasing pressure and criticism from many quarters and its very existence is threatened.

In modern times, however, dowry is a contemptible social evil. It reduces the sacred institution of marriage to a business tran­saction. It degrades a young maiden to the level of a saleable commodity. Poor people have to incur heavy debts to provide their daughter with a handsome dowry. This wrecks them financially. Some people resort to unfair means to meet dowry demands, which poses a grave threat to the moral values of the society. The daugh­ters of poor parents consider themselves a burden on their family and they either opt for a life of disgraceful spinsterhood or commit sui­cide. The dowry system is also an evil since it perpetuates the myth of male superiority. If a bride is harassed for more dowry, it may breed hatred in her mind for her husband and ruin the married life of the couple.

It is very difficult to find a good boy for a girl without paying a high price for the same. Parents of highly educated boys try to demand a large amount of dowry both in cash and in kind.

Thus, whether a parent can pay or not, it has become a com­pulsory present at the time of marriage. It has ruined the lives of many a brilliant girls, because their parents could not afford to give sufficient dowry to satisfy their in-laws. Sometimes the girls commit suicide when their in-laws persecute them to bring more and more money from their parents. Sometimes the greedy husbands along with their parents also kill their wives, when they are not given huge dowry. This accounts for the spurt in cases of bride-burning and violence on women.

The supporter of the dowry system give numerous arguments to justify it. According to them, it is a fine method of setting up an establishment for the newly weds. The second argument is that since the bride's parents are quite choosy about the groom's income, his qualifications, this property, why shouldn't the groom get a price for what he has to offer ? They think that marriage is a girls' life insurance and so the dowry is the premium. Thirdly, the suppor­ters of this system argue, a girl carrying with her a respectable dowry feels confident while entering her in-law's house while a girl without dowry feels uneasy and apprehensive.

Let us talk about the Hindu marriage system and delve into the topic of dowry and bride-burning in India for which we are assembled here. No one doubts that is a most heinous crime perpetrated by greedy persons who want to get rich through the marriage of their sons. The custom of dowry is prevalent in many parts of India where it is regarded only as a voluntary gift to the bride by the parents, friends and relatives and there are no strings attached. In many cases, grooms do not take anything as dowry. Gifts are accepted as a token of love. But when the parents of the groom extort money from the parents of the bride as a recompense for marrying their daughter to their son, keep on increasing the demands after the wedding, finally kill the bride for the outstanding amount, and yet go unpunished by the administrative, legal and judicial system of the country, this must be a product of the overall moral decadence of the country. This is an extremely serious matter. I congratulate the organizers of The First International Conference on Dowry and Bride-Burning in India for focussing the attention of the world on this abominable crime in India.


In Hinduism, marriage is a very holy event in life. According to the Vedic rites, the groom and the bride are trained to fast on the day of their wedding, so that they may concentrate on the spiritual meanings of the marriage commitments. How the despicable practice of demanding dowry found its way into the pious and solemn custom of a Hindu marriage is extremely puzzling. To find an objective answer, one must analyze the history of Hindu people in those parts of India where dowry and bride-burning still continue in full force. In his book, Mr. H. B. Thakur has tried to diagnose the reasons for the degeneration of the Hindu society due to the historical forces of those areas, and their effects. One of the effects was the proliferation of child marriage in North India during the medieval period which was very rare in Vedic India. It became a compulsory practice for the Hindus in North India who lost their independence in the medieval period and could not protect their grown-up daughters. The only way to save the family honor was to marry off the daughter to someone else's family who would be responsible for her protection. Child marriage abounded, and so did the practice of bidding for dowry.

Social reformers of the nineteenth and early twentieth cen­turies clearly perceived the pernicious effects of the dowry system and assiduously strove for its abolition. Raja Ram Mohan Roy, Ishwar Chander Vidya Sagar and Mahatma Gandhi, to name only a few, tried their best to mobilize public opinion against the system. Gandhiji unequivocally expressed his views against dowry when he said "Any Youngman who makes dowry a condition of marriage discredits his education and his country and dishonors womanhood."

From time to time the Government has enacted legislation to extricate the Indian Society from this great social evil. In 1961, it enacted the Dowry Prohibition Act, but the act proved utterly in effective. Instead of showing signs of subsiding, the system took deeper roots, Recently giving or taking of dowry has been made a legally cognizable offence punishable by imprisonment up to two years.

Now there is a great demand by the people that this evil of dowry should be eradicated completely. Many girls and boys are taking pledge that they will not accept dowry at the time of their marriage. Their is no doubt that until and unless the educated youths of the country come forward to abolish this evil from our society nothing tangible can be done to eliminate it once for ever. It is quite heartening to note that during the last few months a strong public opinion has been created against this evil.

In reality a strong propaganda should be started against this evil by all responsible persons in the society. The young men and women should stage demonstrations against those persons who give or take dowry. Of course, the Government should also pass stringent laws against this evil but social evils can only be abolished with the active co-operation of the society.

The youth can definitely play a key role in eradicating this evil practice. Young boys should take a pledge that they will neither demand a dowry nor accept it, and young girls should be resolved not to give their consent to marriage with a boy who demands a dowry. If more and more girls are educated and made economically independent, it will accelerate the process. More love marriages and more inter-caste and inter-provincial marriages should also prove helpful. The cases of 'dowry-free’ marriages should make the prominent news-item in the news bulletin. This would encourage the youth to take the lead.